Unapologetic insolence from an aging subversive

Unapologetic insolence from an aging subversive

Wednesday, 14 April 2021

Golf...

Image courtesy Liveabout

This blog has been a bit neglected of late, as I've been meeting a deadline for a research submission. That's done, so now I can concentrate on more essential activities. 

 Many of my friends and acquaintances play this strange game which requires them to buy lots of gear and lump it around for an hour or two, chasing a strange little dimpled ball that doesn't bounce very well and is easy to lose. 

 Some of them have even spent an arm and a leg on battery-powered mobility devices which remove the only rational reason to play the silly game - that of getting some exercise. I played golf once - or to be more accurate a couple of times. 

My eye-hand coordination has never been great and combined with clubs that are too long, a ball that is too small, and a tiny sweet spot on the end of said club, it's not my game. 

 The last time I played a round of golf (I think it's called a "round") was in Mount Isa in 1994. There used to be a pretty good course in the Isa, kept beautifully green (if a little on the nose) by recycled sewage. They have a website, so it's still there. 

The occasion was the North-West Region Principals' conference and the three-day formal proceedings were rounded off with a golf competition. I attended in my capacity as a member of the regional administrative team and was expected to front up at the clubhouse like everybody else. I cast around desperately to find an excuse to give the competition a miss but was unsuccessful. 

Given that I was the first to tee off, and did so in front of the assembled principals from all North-West schools, I was determined to avoid an air swing. In that I was successful. Club struck ball with a satisfying "thwack", and the ball went straight down the middle of the fairway. Unfortunately, so did the club (It was called a "driver" by the way - I know this stuff). It was a warm afternoon, and my hands were sweating. The driver did a slow and graceful loop and finished up a few metres above the ground in a eucalypt. I can't actually remember where the ball finished up, but I got a round of applause when I climbed the tree and retrieved the club from one of the lower branches. 

 I had hoped the incident (witnessed by about thirty people) had been forgotten. 

Not so. 

When I was appointed to a principal's job in Toowoomba in 1996, I continued to attend principals' conferences. At one, (in 2003 from memory) I was greeted by a colleague who like me, had made the journey south and was now working in Dalby. 

He greeted me with "Gidday, Bob - How's the golf?" This was nine years after the event. I had obviously made a deep and lasting impression.

 I did play golf a bit in the North-west. Night golf at Windorah was interesting. The wallabies come out at night, and even though the ball was visible on account of a little glowing plug inserted through it, the wallabies weren't. 

I can't remember what the penalty was for a wallaby strike...

Comments closed.

16 comments:

Anonymous said...

Yawn.
John Grey

Anonymous said...

"My eye-hand coordination has never been great"
I guess that's why you shot a hole in your tent back in the day.
John Grey

Anonymous said...

Thanks 1735099 - great story well told.

Anonymous said...

Just like your selective use of facts to support political arguments, your use of facts here is haphazard to say the least.
"I played golf once - or to be more accurate a couple of times."
"I did play golf a bit in the North-west. Night golf at Windorah was interesting"
"The last time I played a round of golf "

So what are the facts - you played once, you played twice, you played "a bit", or you played up to Mt Isa incident?
Hard to know just from reading your stuff.
You are a true example of the saying "the left always lie".
John Grey

Anonymous said...

"great story"
With the emphasis on "story".
I'll bet it never happened. Bob was just short of content for his vanity blog.
He'd run out of Vietnam stories.
He needs to produce 3 supporting statements to verify this alleged incident.

John Grey

Anonymous said...

Playing golf on the taxpayers money.
Shame, Bob, shame.
John Grey

Anonymous said...

"This blog has been a bit neglected of late"
Which is in direct contrast to your oft-repeated claim you can write and play on the internet simultaneously.
Which is it?
John Grey

Anonymous said...

"I can't remember"
Seems to be happening a lot to you recently.
John Grey

Anonymous said...

I see on Catallaxy you are arguing about who argues the best.
You're really lost for something worthwhile to do in this world, Bob.
It's a hangover from avoiding responsibility when you were in Vietnam.
John Grey.

Anonymous said...

The funniest thing appearing on this blog is the John Grey dipshit.
Is he for real?
Scoobie-do.

Anonymous said...

"The funniest thing appearing on this blog is the John Grey dipshit."
Someone has to bring intelligence to this vanity blog.
Happy to do it since neither you nor Bob are capable.
Unless, unless, Bob and Scoobie-do are one and the same. The use of a childish nom-de-plume indicates that is a distinct possibility.
John Grey

Anonymous said...

"I had obviously made a deep and lasting impression."
Again, Bob overestimates his value to society.
Nope, Bob is simply remembered for his carelessness and stupidity.
Any thinking man would have wiped his hands down before gripping the golf club.
John Grey

Anonymous said...

Any thinking man would find something more productive to do than vent his spite on a returned soldier.
Ex-Digger

Anonymous said...

My writings are not spite, Ex-Digger.
I simply call out Bob's bullshit whenever I see it.
By the way, he's not a returned soldier - he's a returned Bell and Howell projectionist and blanket stacker.
John Grey.

Anonymous said...

"Any thinking man would find something more productive to do than vent his spite on a returned soldier."
So why is Bob gleefully chronicling the attacks against Ben Roberts-Smith?
Because Bob is not concerned with veterans unless he can wrap himself in the valour of others.
John Grey

Anonymous said...

So ex digger...are you a returned serviceman, an out of work drainage expert, or 1735099?
If he wanted to play the "ex-digger" card, surely the blogger would have done so...oh sorry, you have.
No, I am not John Grey.

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